You've seen it, you've been there. The little groups of people that dance only with each other and with nobody else, worse than a facebook group that only accepts members after the owner's approval. To this one, you have to be invited!
There are two types of cliques in tango.
The beginner clique, which is made exclusively of people from the same class that dance together because they're too scared of dancing with someone who they have not seen in class or because they can only dance with people that can return a similar mistake as the one they have just done.
The advanced clique, which is made of people that have reach such a high status that they can't see anything when they look down. That is also called tango snobbism.
But, I kind of was part of a clique! I didn't really think about it but a few years ago I would dance in milongas with the same people milonga after milonga. I really enjoyed dancing with these people and by the time I danced with them, there was little time to dance with anybody else! And some of them would take offense if I didn't invite them to dance! Is there a difference between dancing with people you like and being part of a clique? Yes, on the former you look forward to dance with other people on the later you avoid anyone that does not have the golden membership card.
The true is that, cliques are kind of uncool. It gives the image to other people that you can't be bothered to get out of your comfort zone, whether it is because you don't want to look bad when dancing with a beginner (if you are an advanced dancer) or because you don't want to look bad when next to an advanced (if you are a beginner). The whole thing about levels in tango is that more advanced people should help less advanced, that's how tango during the golden generation exploded and that's how we should keep it. A tanda in a milonga can make a hell of a difference!
PS - if you liked this post you may want to check our Johanna's post on the same subject, it's worth reading!
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Tango cliques
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It always amuses me to no end to hear endless stories about the fantastic level of dancing in BsAs and how difficult is to get dances there. When it would become apparent to everyone that dancing might be exceptional in BsAs because they are not nice and dance with "everyone"?
I don't dance with people outside of my "clique" because my "clique" is composed of people I like dancing with. When I see someone else that I might like dance with, I "add them to the clique". I will never dance with some people because I don't have to dance with them to find out I will not enjoy it. I do dance with some beginners, particularly the ones who show promise and work hard.
I can't really understand this desire to please everyone, to make everyone feel good that seems so prevalent in North America.
Whether they are helpful or not, cliques are a fact of life, and exist everywhere. Even Tango. I have, over the course of my Tango journey, struggled on and off with the "attitudes" and "clique". In the end, it is neither up to me, nor is it something I choose to take personally.
To me, a good dancer who won't invite another good dancer to dance, just because they don't belong to a clique, is the one that is missing out.
Hey KR. I've written a post on this, and wanted to show a link to that post on the bottom of your post. I tried "create a link" but all that did was put a link to you on MY site. Any ideas?
Hi Sorin:
The fantastic level of BsAs is not high because the best dancers only dance amongst themselves. The fantastic level of BsAs is good because that where all the good dancers are, where they teach and where they hang out.
In the golden period there weren't classes to learn tango. There were only practicas. If you wanted to learn you would sit endlessly at these practicas and wait for some senior person to pick you s a student. This is how it was done, and that was how people got really good in little time - by learning (and I say learning as, by dancing) with the best.
Maybe my attitude has changed a little bit because I am in a place where tango standards are not that high and I am probably one of the people that can help raising them...
All that I am saying is, dance with whoever you feel comfortable dancing but do not start going into the he/she is not good enough for me. You know what, you may be surprised!
btw, I do not live in North America and I'm from a latin country, quite similar to Argentina in ways of thinking
To me, a good dancer who won't invite another good dancer to dance, just because they don't belong to a clique, is the one that is missing out.
Exactly!
I'm not sure...I believe (in fact I *know*) that there are some fine dancers in my area who do not go out to the milonga as much as they would like, specifically because they are not part of the "cool crowd". They know that their cabeceo will be ignored by the cool kids, and there are only so many times a person can put up with being ignored before getting disgusted with the whole thing.
I consider myself not a bad dancer and am enjoying dancing with whomever who treats me with respects regardless their dance levels. I normally have fun with most of the dancers and got lots of invitations. A while ago, I have to walk away from a guy who had dragged me to the middle of the floor and dropped me standing there after the first song. He's a begginer but has been around for at least two years. When I mentioned the incident to someone who is regular at the milonga, the person thought that I was doing something cruel. Comments from anyone?
Hi anonymous:
I obvioulsy do not know what the situation was but he should have told you why he did that. This this person who suggested you were being cruel tell you specifically what you were doing that was so cruel?
It seems to me that a person that does what this person did, regardless of what you did, is a bit rude. He should have told you why he did that. I would.
Thank you, KR. The person who think I was cruel soly based on the fact that he was a "beginer". I never asked why I got droped off on the floor after a single dance. My experience tells me if a person has been around for 2 years then he should know the code of milonga regardless what level he is at. He asked me to dance by pulling my arm away saying "Let's dance" while I was still in a conversation with someone else. That was a bit rude already. I went along and danced smoothly dispite his choppy lead. He left the floor and sat down, leaving me no clue what went wrong. Just really odd.
I think you shouldn't worry about him, he's just clueless!
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